I know it's been a few days. I've been quite busy getting settled in after my trip to Wisconsin/Michigan. It was a decent visit - no fighting with my mother, no anxiety attacks, just good old fashioned fun. I even got to see my grandmother which was a treat. No old friends though. They were all busy which is fine - saves me the trouble of having to talk to them about all the crap I've been going through when I'm pretty sure most of them could care less. People get tired of others trying to educate them all the time and I don't want to be tedious to them.
I get discharged from IOP on Friday. I'm super excited to be honest. I'm ready to be done and I'm hoping I never have to go back. That's not to say I don't value what I've learned there, I just really am tired of it being my focus everyday. It's time to move on and away from everything that brought me back to this point, especially since everything else is going so well in my life. The only thing that worries me is work - they've cut back my hours severely, which I expected, but not this much. It makes me wonder if they're just preparing for something (firing me) or if it's just a normal part of the cycle. I'm probably just being paranoid and should just take a deep breath and calm the hell down. Easier said than done, right? It'll be okay. Really.
J and I are still getting to know each other, but to be honest, I really am falling for him. He's probably one of the sweetest and kindest people I've ever met. He thinks he bores me though. LOL Hardly. He's absolutely fascinating to me. I could listen to him talk for hours about anything. He's a lot like me though. Self deprecating without realizing it, never giving himself enough credit. It's okay though, at least I can understand the behavior and the rationale behind it. He's just so intelligent and funny and delightful. Yes, I'm gushing, but shouldn't I? He's a great man and I'm lucky to have found him before someone else did.
1 comment:
Getting to know you"A" has left me @ a loss for words so many times I've lost count. I throughly enjoy the things she has to share with me about her day to day & beyond. So much so, that i find myself not wanting to stop you even when I allready have heard it all before. I suppose being nervous around someone that means so much to me is natural. Yet it's in your arms that I feel the most at peace.
It is often hard to find something pertinant & meaningful to say when you have given me part of yourself that no one else seemed to want, yet I gave up looking for long ago, believing it was all in vain. That part, is the way that you think & the way you percive this world. It's been a long journey for us both, for people like us seldom find the ones that most deserve the love we have to give. I love you.
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